Being a swinger can be a ton of fun, but it can also be a bit confusing if you don’t know what you’re doing. In this blog, I’m going to give you some tips on how to navigate the lifestyle and make sure it's a good time.

As a good friend of mine recently said, there's no manual for how to be a swinger. Every couple has their own rules and guidelines, so you'll need to talk to your partner and figure out what works for both of you. Further, understand the journey isn't always linear and your experience will vary from others.

Here are some general concepts that should help you have less bumps along the way. 

Communication is everything.

The most important thing for any couple considering swinging is strong communication. You need to talk about your fantasies and desires with each other, and make sure that you are both on the same page. This isn’t just about swinging – it’s about your relationship. If you can’t trust each other enough to discuss this kind of thing, then you probably shouldn’t be swinging in the first place.

It is paramount that you establish your boundaries. What are you comfortable with? What are you not comfortable with? Are there any specific activities that you do or do not want to participate in? Be upfront about your boundaries and make sure that everyone involved understands them.

Understand that swinging is all about consent.

Consent is the bedrock on which the lifestyle stands. Everyone involved in the lifestyle must be on board with everything that is happening. If someone feels uncomfortable with something, they have the right to say no. This should be respected above all else.

Additionally, make sure you gain consent from potential play partners prior to any activity. Sometimes a simple “May I kiss you?” is all that is needed, other times it may warrant a longer conversation. When gaining consent, you need to ensure the person is not impaired. This could be by alcohol, drugs, or just not being in a positive mental space at the time. An intoxicated person is always to be considered unable to provide consent.

Find a compatible play partner(s).

Not all couples are compatible when it comes to swinging. Some couples prefer to swap partners, while others prefer to watch or participate in group sex. It’s important to find a couple or single male/woman who share your interests and boundaries before taking things any further.

Don’t be discouraged if it seems difficult to find people interested. Compatibility between multiple people can be hard to come by but continued effort will pay off. Be authentic and you’ll find the right people who fit into what the lifestyle looks like for you.

Swing safely.

This one goes without saying, but you should always get tested for STDs before engaging in any kind of sexual activity with another people. Swinging can be a fun and safe experience, but only if everyone involved is being responsible about their health.

Once you have been tested, always use protection. Being that individuals who swing have multiple partners, the risk of STD’s and unwanted pregnancy is heightened. The additional sensitivity you may get from going sans protection just isn’t worth what may come in return. Play safe, always.

Be respectful.

Rule one, don’t be a jerk.

Always be respectful of your partner and the others involved in your encounters. This is not about using someone else for your own personal pleasure – it’s about enjoying each other’s company and exploring new sexual experiences. Remember that everyone involved is there because they want to be, so don’t be pushy or aggressive.

Being so is a surefire way not to have a positive experience. While there are many more joining the lifestyle than ever before, swinging can be a small world. If you’re disrespectful to others, it will get around and you’ll quickly find yourself on many no-go lists.

If you’re just starting out in the swinging lifestyle, or even if you’ve been at it for a while, I hope this article has helped. Swinging can be an incredible addition to your relationship, or it can be devastating if the above concepts are not taken into consideration. Always keep these in mind and you'll be sure to enjoy all that the lifestyle brings. 

We want everyone to have a positive experience, so let us know in the comments if there’s anything else you’d like us to cover on the topic of swinging.

Have fun and be safe!

- Chris